Friday, October 24, 2014 releases list of most unbelievable excuses employees have used to call in sick:

The Most Unbelievable Excuses for Calling In Sick
When asked to share the most dubious excuses employees have given for calling in sick, employers reported hearing the following real-life examples:
  1. Employee just put a casserole in the oven.
  2. Employee’s plastic surgery for enhancement purposes needed some "tweaking" to get it just right.
  3. Employee was sitting in the bathroom and her feet and legs fell asleep. When she stood, up she fell and broke her ankle.
  4. Employee had been at the casino all weekend and still had money left to play with on Monday morning.
  5. Employee woke up in a good mood and didn't want to ruin it.
  6. Employee had a “lucky night” and didn’t know where he was.
  7. Employee got stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store and couldn't get out.
  8. Employee had a gall stone they wanted to heal holistically.
  9. Employee caught their uniform on fire by putting it in the microwave to dry.
  10. Employee accidentally got on a plane.
Playing Hooky…or Playing with Fire?
Though the majority of employers give their employees the benefit of the doubt, 31 percent say they have checked to see if an employee was telling the truth in one way or another. Among employers who have checked up on an employee who called in sick, asking to see a doctor’s note was the most popular way to find out if the absence was legit (66 percent), followed by calling the employee (49 percent). As many as 15 percent of employers went the extra mile (quite literally) and drove past the employee’s house.
Nearly 1 in 5 employers (18 percent) say they have fired an employee for calling in sick with a fake excuse.
Tweet Revenge
Some workers have inadvertently busted themselves online. One in four employers (24 percent) have caught an employee lying about being sick by checking social media. Of those, 22 percent have actually fired the employee, but 54 percent were more forgiving, only reprimanding the employee for the lie. Read the rest here

First of all, #6 seems like a totally legit excuse. Who hasn't woken up in some strangers bed with no idea where you are geographically. #4 also seems like a valid reason, can't break that hot streak!

The real story here though is the effort employers go through to catch fakers. Driving past the employee's house? That's like psycho ex-girlfriend behavior. And who are the idiots getting caught on social media? If you call in sick it's probably not a good idea to go on facebook and brag about it. If you're calling in sick to go do something, maybe don't upload the pictures to instagram until the weekend.

Friday, September 26, 2014

Little boy yells at his mom for getting preggo

This kid gets it. So young and even he can realize his parents only have a limited amount of time/money to spend on him and he already has to share that with his little brother.

Monday, July 14, 2014

The World Cup

The world cup is finally over, which means we can finally stop talking about soccer.

America really jumped on the world cup bandwagon, causing many to proclaim that "soccer has arrived!" in the US but I doubt it will take much more than a few months before we've all forgotten about it.

Pro soccer in the US is largely thought of as uninteresting. It is hard to argue with the low scoring and constant diving. However, I think I have determined how we can fix soccer and make it watchable:

1. Offsides

Offsides in soccer is fucking bullshit. See my sweet diagram:

In every other sport (basketball, hockey, even football in a way) this would be an awesome play. The offense (X) beats the defender to get into scoring position. In soccer, you can't pass to a player who is past the forward most defender or something like that.
I would change it to be more like hockey with an offensive zone, maybe even a shot clock.

2. Play Lacrosse instead.

Lacrosse is like an awesome hybrid of soccer and hockey. Some leagues even allow fighting. In the pros they have a shot clock. That makes it fast with lots of shots and lots of hitting.
Maybe if you played lacrosse with a soccer ball...

Friday, January 31, 2014

Waste Management Open

Today I will be attending the Waste Management Phoenix Open at TPC Scottsdale. I've never been to a PGA event before but I expect it should be a good time, especially after it's been described as "the drunkest tournament of the PGA season"

Pics and updates later today/tomorrow. For real time updates follow me on twitter @newnaughty

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Can someone make sense of what is going on here?

One of my friends from NH just sent me this video of a cop pushing a car through an intersection in the snow. I can't figure out how to upload the video since it was sent on facebook but this screen shot pretty much tells the whole story.

Lacrosse announcer reinvents the announcing game

Click here to see the video because I can't be bothered to embed it

The other announcer at the end sums it up best: "I don't know what was more impressive, that goal or that call"

P.S. How about the pass that set up that goal. Just wide open.

Thursday, October 31, 2013

So the Red Sox won. Boston is sure to be a fucking mad house tonight. I heard the president was there today too? Strangely no one gave a shit, even the local papers barely mentioned it:
Anyways the game was actually pretty great, which should mean something coming from someone that regularly compares watching baseball to watching paint dry. Yet for me the victory was somewhat soured by the Bruins losing. I didn't watch much of that game since I was watching the Red Sox but it seems like it could have been much worse if it wasn't for Rask. He kept knocking them away but they would get rebound after rebound. The Bruins were outshot 23 to 31. Some great plays but obviously not their best performance. Too bad since a win in Pittsburgh would have made the win in Boston that much sweeter. Good thing its only the beginning of the season!

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Bruins win, Red Sox win, Celtics win.

Great night to be a Boston fan.

Maybe not such a great night to be Loui Eriksson:

Friday, October 18, 2013


This weekend I am moving into a new place in Scottsdale, AZ. I know this site has kinda been put on the back burner the last few months but now I think its time to revamp the site and start anew as NewNaughty:West

It won't be long until another one of the original NewNaughty members will be moving to LA to pursue his dreams so I think over time we should have a good variety of stories from AZ and LA. Hopefully with the occasional Boston story mixed in.

Hockey season has started which means you can probably expect some Bruins talk as well but that depends on how much time I spend actually watching the games instead of just getting drunk and playing GTA V.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Last Night We Went Out In New Hampshire And...

Me: Why did we come here, this place sucks.
Batman: Because this where everyone our age hangs out, it's like a college bar.
Me: Well is it a gay college bar? Because there is a lot of dudes here.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

I've noticed alot of girls have gotten into relationships towards the end of 2012. Well I am going to make a prediction: 90% of relationships that started between August and February will be done by July.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

1 1/2 oz 151 proof rum
2 - 3 dashes Tabasco sauce

Build ingredients in a shot glass, and serve.

Sounds scary.
It's called a prairie dog; some girl recommended this shot to me on facebook but I've yet to find anyone with a stomach strong enough to try it with me. 
This got me thinking about other shots I've never tried:
Feeling Canadian? How about a 'Moose Fart':
1 part Absolut vodka
1 part Crown Royal Canadian whiskey
1 part Kahlua coffee liqueur
1 part Bailey's Irish cream

Be careful when ordering this next one, the bartender might take it the wrong way:
Sit On My Face 
1/3 oz Kahlua coffee liqueur
1/3 oz Frangelico hazelnut liqueur
1/3 oz Bailey's Irish cream

Burning Nazi
1/2 oz Jagermeister herbal liqueur
1/2 oz Rumple Minze peppermint liqueur

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